March 16, 2010

Zombies on vacation

My children are afraid of zombies. This is not my fault. They have been playing a game called Roblox which has a zombie mission in it. I don't know how zombies that look like they are made out of Legos can be scary but obviously, they are.

The children are on spring break this week and spending their vaction with my mom. As she is the Grandma Berry, they have been spoiled rotten. Their adventures last well into the evening and they get home past nightfall. This wouldn't be an issue at my house as we pull the car straight into the garage and go into the house. My mother's house does not have an attached garage. Her garage is a huge shop building out on the back of her lot. To get from the garage to the house involves a walk of about 50 yards through the trees in her yard.

This wasn't a huge deal when we were little as the trees and bushes weren't nearly as large. I can remember sometimes though that you wanted to sprint that walk to the house just because it was dark and imaginations run wild.

Last night, they walked to the house with her for the first time.

"Why are you all hanging on my pockets?"

"Zombies."

"There are zombies out here."

"There are no zombies out here. I've lived out here 25 years and have never seen a zombie. Get inside."

End of discussion last night. Tonight is a different matter.

Logan runs ahead to get to the door first tonight. Decker and Arina are practically climbing in Mom's pockets. Mom gets out her flashlight.

"Why didn't you get that out last night."

"I didn't really need it but you two must."

They are still freaking out about the zombies lurking in the dark bushes and trees. Wide eyed they round the edge of the garage. There are several cedar trees on this side that usually have many birds nesting at night. The kids must have startled them because right when the reached the edge the bushes start shaking violently. The birds start flapping and the branches are thrashing like undead creatures are going to burst from the center.

The children freeze, eyes rolling fully aware that zombies are going to lurch out and rip their skulls open. My mother is trying not to laugh at their evident terror and get them inside.

They round the corner to the house where Logan says, "You have a flashlight?"

"Yes."

"Well thanks," he says with sarcasm as he's been standing here in the dark alone being a tasty bit of zombie bait.

This tells me that I need to teach them the zombie rules so they won't get eaten. Staring with Rule #1: Cardio.

3 comments:

Suzanne said...

I LAUGHED SO HARD THAT I WOKE UP THAD!!!! He actually got mad and told me to quit reading that and go to sleep.

Tasty little bit of zombie bait. Classic.

Sarah said...

My children are undisturbed by zombies and know that they only really want to eat your brains. Well and that you have to shoot them in head for them to really be dead.

Scientific Chick said...

At least they're not in love with vampires.