I didn't expect to do this, this week.
I'm not old enough.
I wasn't old enough last year.
I wasn't old enough a few years ago.
It's not supposed to be like this.
It's not fair.
He didn't promise a fair life. He gives us hope. He brings joy in sorrow. He is the center of the hurricane, where the calm reigns. He is the glimmer that brings sense. He is the peace when we have had to trade one for another.
We don't think we should have to watch our sisters, our friends be widowed young. When lives are full of potential, full of beginning. I watched my oldest, dearest friend break. Now I watch the sister I lived with for the longest time break.
The breaks heal and form into a new thing, a breathable quiet strength. They are beautiful these two. Everyday stronger, every day quiet beauty growing inside. Doing and living and moving where I fear I would fail. Love them, lift them up.
We love the plan maker, but we don't ever understand the plan.
11'For I know the plans that I have for you,' declares the LORD, 'plans for welfare and not for calamity to give you a future and a hope.